scruffguys: April 2016

Stop the Talk That Drains You: Self-Talk to a Powerful
You!

If you
lack energy, feel defeated or angry some days, and generally have a sense of
malaise, maybe it is time to un-invite those voices – or change them out for
friendlier ones.

You
know how there is always that person who can’t wait to bring you down, burst
your bubble and tell you how bad things are? Well, sometimes that person is
you. Those voices in your head that say you aren’t good enough, life stinks and
things will never change. They roll around and around and steal your happiness
and your contentment. They urge you to do things that you might regret, and
they remind you all of the time how you just aren’t good enough.

Did you ever think about
the voices – where do they come from? Why are they so hard on you? Why do they
carry such a negative tone? If you saw someone on the street talking to
themselves, you might step off the sidewalk and give a wide berth. You’d
probably label them “crazy,” but we talk to ourselves all day long and we don’t
think anything about it!

The internal voices often
defeat us before we have even started something. They point out all of the
pitfalls and all of the problems. They zap our energy before we’ve even begun a
task.

The voices come in
uninvited; after all, you’d probably not allow another person to talk to you
the way you talk to yourself. You would be appalled if your best friend said
the things to you that you take for granted as they pass through your
consciousness!

If you lack energy, feel
defeated or angry some days, and generally have a sense of malaise, maybe it is
time to un-invite those voices – or change them out for friendlier ones. While
it may seem automatic and natural to speak so negatively in your mind, you can
take your voices back and have a more powerful you emerge.

Three key things to get
back to a more powerful you:

1. Recognize that the
voices are invited in and you can invite them to leave. This means first
acknowledging that they are there – awareness is the first step. Start to
notice when you feel stressed, sad, defeated or angry. What is causing that
negative emotion? It’s likely a reaction to an event or a condition where the
voices start to point out those terrible things. Be aware that they are there,
and they are chattering to you.

2. Once you “hear” the
voices, start talking to them: “I don’t need you.” “You aren’t welcome here.”
Yes, treat them as if they are outsiders who wandered into your brain but are
not permanent visitors. Actually (mentally) speak to them and tell them you are
inviting them to leave.

You know how there is
always that person who can’t wait to bring you down, burst your bubble and tell
you how bad things are? Well, sometimes that person is you. Those voices in
your head that say you aren’t good enough, life stinks and things will never
change. They roll around and around and steal your happiness and your
contentment. They urge you to do things that you might regret, and they remind
you all of the time how you just aren’t good enough.

The internal voices often
defeat us before we have even started something. They point out all of the
pitfalls and all of the problems. They zap our energy before we’ve even begun a
task.